Monday, January 26, 2009
My Friend
One time I went to Hy-Vee and bought one of those whole rotisserie chickens because, well, because i was really hungry. On the way home I named that bird Sir William Rothschild III and we spoke about a range of topics from the government and political upheavals in the east, to the nature of man and the true meaning of good and evil. Sir William had some brilliant insight and was an avid student of Nietzsche and Hume. His views, though slightly skewed by todays standards, were refreshing and invigorating, they strayed from the common rhetoric used by many rich uninspired ivy league graduates who all too often ramble off quote after quote without implementing any of their own opinions. I asked him if he had any ambitions to run for office in the future or if he planned to stay with strictly avian endeavors. His response was a drawn out dirge of self-righteous theories about the solidarity of man and a few biblical references to the apocalypse. During his rant I realized that he didn't know anything because he was just a delicious rotisserie chicken...and he was getting cold. So I ate that bird. I ate the whole damn thing.
The Lunch Invite
Seth...: Lunch today???
Me...: Let us divulge our senses with the succulent smells and flavors at an omnipotent franchise of the fast food industry. With their ever increasing social awareness and health conciencious menu items one would be led to believe that they stand for more than just greedy capitalist driven ends. Even their employees are beginning to be offered medical insurance and 401k plans. OR is this recent trend of charity an ends to a means of evil that began over 20 years ago? Are the excercise programs, fund raising events, and youth leadership programs the final nail into the coffin of hopeless dependence that these giants of food service have built for us? We wander like cattle into the doors of these death camps and willingly pay these zealots to drain our vitality through delicious yet empty foods. We are left wanting more after a half hour because our bodies recieved plenty of substance but with a sizable lack of vital nutrients. The human body and mind will continue to function but only as a puppet continues to function at the hand of its master. With each juicy double cheeseburger we are bartering our spiritual essence and ambition, and yes, in return we do receive a delightful treat that satisfies the desire for the moment but leaves us groggy and drained of energy later. With this lack of energy it is much harder for a person to find the will to get up and prepare a proper meal later and this laziness drives us mindlessly back through the doors of the death machine for more mind controll serum. I've seen it all a hundred times. Let us unite my brother and take a stand for our longevity sake and our soul's sake against these pagan demons of capitalist mockery! Let us join hands with our obese brethren and sing the songs of rebellion unto the spires of the megaconglomerate fortresses of evil! Our song will resound with such power as to crack the very foundations under the seats of these grotesque pushers of sin and gluttony. With time we will see the weight of their corruption bring them down in a crumbling landslide of broken tyranny and egoisms, and we will watch it all fall deep into the abyssmal depths of the nothingness that is the hell reserved for such over-indulgers. But first lets grab a bite to eat...how about 11:45?
Seth...: You need help...
Me...: Let us divulge our senses with the succulent smells and flavors at an omnipotent franchise of the fast food industry. With their ever increasing social awareness and health conciencious menu items one would be led to believe that they stand for more than just greedy capitalist driven ends. Even their employees are beginning to be offered medical insurance and 401k plans. OR is this recent trend of charity an ends to a means of evil that began over 20 years ago? Are the excercise programs, fund raising events, and youth leadership programs the final nail into the coffin of hopeless dependence that these giants of food service have built for us? We wander like cattle into the doors of these death camps and willingly pay these zealots to drain our vitality through delicious yet empty foods. We are left wanting more after a half hour because our bodies recieved plenty of substance but with a sizable lack of vital nutrients. The human body and mind will continue to function but only as a puppet continues to function at the hand of its master. With each juicy double cheeseburger we are bartering our spiritual essence and ambition, and yes, in return we do receive a delightful treat that satisfies the desire for the moment but leaves us groggy and drained of energy later. With this lack of energy it is much harder for a person to find the will to get up and prepare a proper meal later and this laziness drives us mindlessly back through the doors of the death machine for more mind controll serum. I've seen it all a hundred times. Let us unite my brother and take a stand for our longevity sake and our soul's sake against these pagan demons of capitalist mockery! Let us join hands with our obese brethren and sing the songs of rebellion unto the spires of the megaconglomerate fortresses of evil! Our song will resound with such power as to crack the very foundations under the seats of these grotesque pushers of sin and gluttony. With time we will see the weight of their corruption bring them down in a crumbling landslide of broken tyranny and egoisms, and we will watch it all fall deep into the abyssmal depths of the nothingness that is the hell reserved for such over-indulgers. But first lets grab a bite to eat...how about 11:45?
Seth...: You need help...
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